everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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