I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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