I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize