So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
