I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
