I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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