real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
