were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Couch. On fire.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
