Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
