i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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