You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
