So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
