Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
