I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
