dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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