I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Let's paint friendship bongs
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
