I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
