just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
