why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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