she looked like the before picture.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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