"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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