I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
