Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
