I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
My balls are so social today.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
