then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
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