R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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