Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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