Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize