No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
