What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
