Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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