I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize