Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
