just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize