oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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