Well apparently he's into motor boating.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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