you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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