do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
