And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
