she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
