I'm gonna have a badass scar
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
