I'm gonna have a badass scar
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize
