I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
