Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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