So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
do herpes really smell.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
