I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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