this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
