I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
