At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I need water and some morals
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
