O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
